Welcome to the Artist’s Eyeball launch party! Woo, streamers, balloons, cakes and small children peeing themselves with excitement (what, it could happen).

Pull up a chair, pour yourself a drink and have a slice of cake…

photo credit: Rubyran

The Artist’s Eyeballs were quite insistent that they had never had a proper launch and that not enough people knew about them. When they heard that I was meant to be launching something at the end of November for Customer Love, they started tugging on my sleeve. Since I felt kind of bad that I’d launched them accidentally and then buggered off to Holland for a week, I gave in.

Besides, it meant I didn’t have to create something new – ssssh, don’t tell them!

Btw, this is what I’m doing instead of a Birthday sale because My Inner Businesswoman decided that 10 days before Christmas was a mind-bogglingly stupid time to try to sell anything that wasn’t Christmas related. Although if you do want to buy someone an Eyeball or a session of consulting as a Christmas present, rest assured that I will find a way of putting ribbon on it, even if I have to wear the ribbon myself.

A present for you

First of all, a fabulous freebie, wherein I demonstrate ‘stuff that I know’ and you get to think, ‘shit, I’m doing that wrong’ and rush off to your site to fix it. Even if you’re not in the market for an Artist’s Eyeball, I hope you’ll watch this 5 minute demonstration video and share it with your friends.

Huge thanks to Carol Nunan for bravely volunteering to be a guinea pig in exchange for a free Artist’s Eyeball.

Btw, this is why you should sign up for my newsletter. Last week I put a call-out to my newsletter peeps for volunteers and got a fantastic response – thanks so much to everyone who responded, I was hugely impressed at your willingness to volunteer. I’ve also picked a second victim, Julie Shackson: her site will feature in another demo video later in the week.

Why you should buy An Artist’s Eyeball

Well, because they’re awesome!

Of course I would say that, I’m their mama. However, I can report that the majority of people who’ve received one of these have been instantly fired up and usually started making changes to their websites straight away.

Kirsty cut right to the chase – what worked, what didn’t, what would make my sales page better. I felt encouraged & excited to have some concrete steps to make improvements. I was a bit afraid the critique might hurt, but Kirsty knows how to make you feel good about what you have, while helping you make it even better.

Melissa Dinwiddie from A Creative Life

The Artist’s Eyeball was an eye opener. Kirsty gently but firmly told me my sales page isn’t about ME but my CUSTOMERS.

LaVonne Ellis from The Complete Flake

What you get

You get a highly detailed written report that points out everything that I think you’re doing wrong on your website or blog. Lest this sounds too depressing for words, rest assured that I also enthuse about the stuff you’re doing well. You get a lot of eye and brain for your money: Full Eyeballs tend to be between 5 and 10 pages long, sometimes even more and even a Mini-Eyeball will usually contain several pages of suggestions.

Now I know this might not seem like the most exciting thing in the world to buy but holy cow, these are seriously useful. You get a nice big list of things to tackle and often a bit of longterm strategy thrown in for free. Instead of aimlessly going around in circles for months or years wondering why this internet lark isn’t working out for you, you get pointed in the right direction at last. You can also work through things at your own pace, confident that you’re making positive changes.

And if I can’t find anything to say about your site or you don’t find the report useful, I’ll give you a full refund.

Super-duper Special Offer

I highly recommend snagging one of the larger packages because they’re an amazingly sweet deal. In fact, I won’t be offering these prices ever again, this is an introductory offer only.

….Drumroll please….

Mini Eyeball – £20
The mini-Eyeballs are staying at £20 because that’s already ridiculously cheap and my Inner Businesswoman wasn’t having anything to do with a deal on these.

Blog Eyeball (including up to 3 static pages) – £50, now only £35
The Blog Eyeball is down to £35, which is £15 off. That’s some kind of complicated percentage that I can’t work out because my maths guru, Colin Beveridge has gone on holiday to America. How inconsiderate!

Full Artist’s Eyeball – £100, now only £50
A Full Artist’s Eyeball normally retails at £100 but for 3 days only I’m offering it at half price. £50 for an entire site analysis is crazy: I had to lock my Inner Businesswoman in the basement to get away with this.

Full Eyeball with consulting – £160, now only £100
The Full Artist’s Eyeball with an extra brains consulting session is currently going for £100 instead of £160. That’s a full written website analysis plus 45 minutes of follow-up on Skype where you can delve deeper into what I’ve recommended. Total bargain.

What if my site isn’t ready yet?

There is no expiry date: you can buy an Artist’s Eyeball now and use it later (thanks to Skaja for asking this question). Just make sure that you tell me on the order that you want to wait. It would also be helpful if you can give me a rough idea when you’re likely to need it, so that I can make a note to follow up with you.

Deadline

You’ve only got three days to take advantage of this: the offer will close at 5pm GMT on Friday 3rd December 2010.

If you’re absolutely desperate for one but you can’t afford it with Christmas coming up, email me and we’ll sort something out. Please don’t be shy or embarrassed. I know what it’s like to need something when you’re skint and while I can’t lower the price any further, I’m happy to work out a payment plan with you. But you’ve got to brave enough to step up and ask.

Please note:
If there’s a high demand during this sale, it will take me longer than the usual 7 days to do your Eyeball.

Honeys, please do me a huge favour and pass this on by clicking on one of the share buttons below…

Welcome to the Artist’s Eyeball launch party! Woo, streamers, balloons, cakes and small children peeing themselves with excitement (what, it could happen). Pull up a chair, pour yourself a drink...

photo credit: ShironekoEuro[busy]

1) Customer Love challengers are amazing
The support, love, ideas and kindness I’ve received from fellow challengers has been incredible. I’ve met cool new people and deepened relationships with existing people and this was undeniably the best part of the experience for me.

If you are thinking about doing the next Customer Love Challenge in February 2011, it’s worth it for this reason alone.

2) I need to get better at promotion
This is an area where I totally fell down. I did lots of great things but then either got coy about telling people or just didn’t have the time. This is a long-standing issue for me but Customer Love brought it into sharp relief.

All month I could hear my art college tutor saying the words, “Kirsty, you need to do more with less”. He was right 9 years ago and it’s still true today but my ADD nature struggles with that limitation. My brain is always all, ‘ooh shiny, new thing, shiny new thing! Oh wait what was I doing again?’

I need to do some Big Thinking about how to work with this aspect of myself because I’m clearly never going to eradicate it.

3) A stronger strategy would have given better results
When I take part in the next challenge, I plan to be more prepared. That said, being spontaneous was a lot of fun.

4) I overestimated the amount I could get done
You know, I don’t know why this is always such a surprise to me since it happens all the freaking time. Yet I am always blithely convinced I can do twice as much as humanly possible in half the time. What can I say, I’m an eternal optimist. Completely clearing the decks before doing Customer Love would also have been smart. We live and learn, people, we live and learn…

5) Deep strategy stuff fascinates the hell out of me
I love it to death. I even love the word ‘strategy’ and wish it hadn’t been overused by boring corporate types. Part of my mission is to reclaim it. We can have strategy, people and it can be fun strategy with extra cakes and biscuits.

6) I need to be more strategic about ‘free’
I talked about this in my Customer Love guest post – The Volunteer Junkie. Please read the incredible wisdom in the comments.

7) It’s a bit crowded in my head
I have an Inner Businesswoman, a Volunteer Junkie and a Girl Reporter who’s in charge of the newsletter (she’s very keen, bless her and survives on biscuits and cups of tea because I don’t pay her). Unearthing these metaphors was one of my favourite parts of Customer Love.

8) Not everything I tried worked
I attempted a bit of public Twitter loving but it felt slightly icky to me. I realised that I’m not comfortable singling people out for public loving – unless there’s a good reason to mention them, it feels artificial and weird. I also worry about the hurt feelings of those I haven’t singled out.

But that’s OK, it’s good to try stuff to find where your edges and tolerances are and I value learning this.

9) Be clear about what you’re offering
Saying ‘I’ve got some free time, who needs help’ on Twitter won’t get nearly as many responses as something specific like, ‘who wants a mini-Eyeball on their sales page?’

10) I sometimes swallow my words
But it’s not my fault, it’s because I’m Scottish.

I discovered this whilst listening to the audio interview I did with LaVonne Ellis about my art, business and the importance of respecting our limitations.

[PS. To anyone interviewing me in the future, get me to say the words ‘film’ or ‘iron’ – the way I say them will make you laugh your ass off.]

11) I rocked the tiara on VYou
I loved making these little videos but the VYou thing didn’t take off as much I’d hoped, probably because I didn’t promote it enough. Although I mentioned it on Twitter and Facebook a few times, I never told you guys about it (sorry, my bad!)

I intend to carry on with it though and would be delighted to answer questions in my newly repaired tiara, so please pop on over there and ask one.

12) I’m loathe to ask people what they want
I get shy and embarrassed about asking people what services and products they want or need, in case I can’t deliver. Getting the hell over that piece of ridiculousness will be my challenge for the next round of Customer Love.

13) It IS important to launch something
My Inner Businesswoman wasn’t at all happy that I said I wasn’t going to sell anything in my first Customer Love post, so I’ve revised that decision. We’re not letting The Volunteer Junkie make those kind of choices any more. Plus my Artist’s Eyeballs insisted they wanted a party with streamers and buns since they never had a proper launch and hey, nobody wants sulking services.

Coming tomorrow:
The official Artist’s Eyeball launch with a special 72 hour Customer Love sale!

14) I can’t tell the difference between peers & customers
It quickly became apparent that I’m way more comfortable loving on my peers than on my clients and I’m hazy on the difference because I tend to think that everyone is a potential peer. In fact, I’ve realised that I’m still not clear who my ideal customers are. More Big Thinking is required on this issue over the next few months.

15) I’m not comfortable pitching to my friends
In fact, I’m not comfortable selling at all. This wasn’t exactly news but again, Customer Love highlighted it. However, I’m about to take Pam Slim’s Ethical Selling That Works course in December, which I’m hoping will sort out some of these tangled emotional threads.

16) My business needs a new name
SOS For Artists was never right and now it feels like a shoe that’s too tight. I think it’s limiting and far too negative. An amazing late-night Twitter brainstorming session revealed that the core of what I do is about seeing and explaining patterns, which makes total sense when you consider how important patterns are in my art. The lovely Amy from Antemortem Arts dubbed me a Patternista, which I just adore.

17) Sometimes old school is better
When I bought a mic & headphones set, I should have bought one with a traditional jack instead of a USB connection. However, even with that caveat, my audio quality is hugely improved – get a headset, people, it makes a world of difference.

18) There are awesome people outside your niche
Who knew that an elf who does tiling would be so funny and delightful? Who knew that a sex therapist could teach me so much about newsletters? Who knew that I would become good friends with a maths tutor?

19) And finally…
I will use the word ‘trebuchet’ in one of my sales pages even if I have to invent a brand new product to do it!

photo credit: ShironekoEuro[busy] 1) Customer Love challengers are amazing The support, love, ideas and kindness I’ve received from fellow challengers has been incredible. I’ve met cool new people and deepened...

Face facts, my little cupcakes, you are not good at everything.

I know, I know, your mother told you that you could do anything you wanted in life. She did not, however, tell you that you could do everything. And if she did, she was wrong.

photo credit: Casey Serin

Creative people have a bizarre tendency – probably born from the Starving Artist Mindset – to believe that they can do everything. Sadly, it just ain’t so.

Can you have a stab at it? Yes, probably. Will it be any good? Debatable. In truth, other people can often do things better than you and in far less time.

For example, whenever possible I outsource my graphics. I can kind of do graphics but I suck at them: it takes forever and makes me all stabby. Nasty, tricksy graphics, we hates them, Precious.

So I will budget like crazy to hire my wonderful graphics person, Lisa Valuyskaya. Lisa does in a couple of hours what it would take me days of hysterical sobbing to achieve. Ha, who am I kidding? Even with the sobbing, my efforts are pitiful compared to hers. Know why? Because she’s a professional graphic designer and I am not.

Help, help, I have no money

It’s sucky – you’d love to hire someone but your kids/pets/landlord need to eat. It’s just not an option.

In that situation, there are several choices:
Barter
Go without
Find a creative work-around
Outsource those tasks to parts of yourself

The first three are pretty self-explanatory but what about that last one? Outsourcing to yourself? What the hell?

OK, here’s what it means. When I have a task that I dislike and I can’t afford to hire someone, I try to find an aspect of myself that can deal and then I delegate to that sub-personality.

For example, my Inner Businesswoman is now responsible for financial decisions. I find asking for money difficult, so she does that bit. She overrides my Volunteer Junkie who likes to say things like, ‘oh hey, we could just barter instead’. My Inner Businesswoman is in charge of the bottom line and she reminds my Volunteer Junkie that there are bills to pay and the Inland Revenue does not accept vegetables and eggs, no matter how happy the chickens are.

Right now my Inner Businesswoman is very cross about the state of my book-keeping and is threatening to hire an Inner Accountant.

Another example. I have been struggling with newsletters but I was brushing my teeth the other day when to my surprise, an inner Girl Reporter suddenly turned up. She’s keen as mustard and doesn’t need to be paid because apparently she’s an intern. I hope she likes typing.

Hmm, this could be getting a leetle bit out of hand…

It does work though. Marketing making you cringe? Create your own PR person. Having trouble standing up for yourself? Oh honey, your Inner Diva has that one covered. Need help with the filing? Just access your Inner Secretary

Stock photo of Joan from Mad Men

And no, it doesn’t matter if you’re male, you can still imagine yourself as Joan from Mad Men. You’ve probably got better legs for stockings anyway.

Just don’t blame me if tidying up the studio requires an Inner Archaeologist.

A Caveat

This only works if you can access a part of yourself that is vaguely competent.

My Inner Graphic Designer is clearly an eight year old child who’s prone to temper tantrums and doesn’t understand what’s wrong with Comics Sans. If your Inner Accountant seems like the kind of guy who’s going to run off to Bermuda with your money, you should definitely hire a real one or find a more competent friend you can barter skills with.

Get a hat. Get lots of hats

‘Wearing several different hats’ is a critically important skill for any self-employed person.

I have taken this to its logical conclusion and frequently wear my sequin tiara when I’m working on business stuff. Apparently my Inner Businesswoman is a bit of a princess. But because I do it often, putting on the tiara now sends my brain the message, ‘hey, we’re doing business stuff now’. I’m thinking of expanding this: I’d like a writing hat and an art hat to add to my business tiara.

Dammit, I heard that. No, my art hat will NOT be a beret!

Given the choice between sticking their toe in a blender and having to market themselves, many creative people would have to sit down and think about it.

I understand. It’s cringe-worthy, embarrassing and gruelling putting your delicate, precious, creative endeavours out there.

In my experience, anything that helps you stand slightly apart from your creative work helps immensely. It could be silly hats, a public persona, a pseudonym or parts of yourself temporarily taking charge. Start thinking of yourself as a one-person publishing company instead of just a writer. Hell, delegate to your cuddly toys or draw paper doll alter-egos if it helps. You could even ask the cat to take charge. Actually, no, don’t do that, most cats have no work ethic and they’ll screw things up just to mess with you.

Now excuse me, I have to go, my Inner Businesswoman is tapping her foot, apparently time is money or some such shit…

Face facts, my little cupcakes, you are not good at everything. I know, I know, your mother told you that you could do anything you wanted in life. She did...

One day I’m going to come up with a clever title for these round-ups. But not, apparently, today.

Prize Update

About a million years ago – OK, two months ago – I asked for name suggestions for my coaching service and offered a free consulting session for the winning name.

I got some wonderful ideas but none of them felt quite right to me. I’ve been brooding away on it ever since & have finally hit on the right name. The sales page for ‘Pertinent Questions’ will be up as soon as I’ve finished writing it.

I’m going to award the consulting prize to Amber Dawn for her suggestion ‘Knotty Fixes’. Even though I haven’t used it as the final name, I utterly adored this and I’m going to nab it for my sales copy. Well done, Amber.

Thanks to everyone else for their awesome suggestions: every single one of you helped so much with my tortuously slow thought process and I am deeply grateful. And I’m sorry that it took so long to update you all, I really did need to sit with it for this long.

Customer Love Update

Wonderful stuff has been happening with Customer Love.

David Crandall’s guest post, ‘What Is A Customer?’ was an eye-opener for me. I also enjoyed ‘Who’s Got Time For Customer Love?’by Sandi Faviell Amorim from Deva Coaching.

I found Sue Mitchell’s hour-long interview with Customer Love founder, LaVonne Ellis, deeply inspiring.

People have been loving hard on their peeps. Here are my pick of the offers so far:

Get free help with numbers from my favourite maths tutor, Colin Beveridge. OK, so he’s the ONLY maths tutor I know, but he’s still my favourite.

Melissa Dinwiddie from A Creative Life is offering free Sandbox Sessions throughout November. If you’d like a bit of accountability while you work on Your Wonderful Thing, this will be right up your street. Melissa is a delightful, kind and interesting person and I’m sure she’d be a joy to work with.

My Stuff

Thanks to Helen Birch from the wonderful drawdrawdraw blog for featuring my Diary Project drawings. Turns out that Helen & I have a shared love of drawing on envelopes.

Don’t forget you can still sign up for the Within Limits class that I’m teaching with Tara Swiger on Wednesday 10th November.

Cool stuff from around the web

Pretty by Kate Makkai is 3 minutes of absolutely astounding, powerful, hard-hitting slam poetry that every woman needs to see. ‘Slam poetry?’, I hear you say. Yep. Just trust me on this one and watch it. There is one swear word in it.

This week I also fell head over heels in love with comedian and ace pianist, Tim Minchin. Most of his stuff is entirely NSFW, so again, please don’t click if that bothers you. I should also warn you that this is ridiculously, insanely catchy – I’ve been singing it all week.

Enjoy your weekend, my lovelies…

One day I’m going to come up with a clever title for these round-ups. But not, apparently, today. Prize Update About a million years ago – OK, two months ago...

Hey lovelies, it’s been killing me to keep this quiet, so I’m chuffed to bits that I can finally announce my Super-Exciting Something.

Ta-da!

Next week I’ll be teaching my first ever online class in collaboration with Tara Swiger from Blonde Chicken and Crafting A Business. As you’ll see if you watch the video below, I am quite ridiculously excited about this. In fact, it was all I could do not to pepper this entire post with exclamation marks.

What’s it about?

The class is called ‘Within Limits’ & it’s for those of you who want to have a creative business despite having time or energy challenges like an illness, children or another job. I wanted to share some of the things that I’ve learnt from my bloody-minded determination to have an art career (and now a shiny new business), despite having Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and raising a kid. Tara and I felt that November was the perfect time to offer this class because the holiday season tends to bring those time/energy challenges into sharp relief.

When is it?

The class is on Wednesday 10th November at 3pm Eastern Time and consists of an hour-long call with Tara and I, followed by a Twitter chat. You’ll then be sent a recording of the class AND a worksheet that will help you set out your own Time & Energy Budget. We’ll be talking tips and more importantly, the attitudes that can help you manage your own restrictions.

What does it cost?

The class is only $35, which is outrageously good value. Just to recap, that’s an online call, a Twitterchat, a recording and a worksheet, all for $35.

Oh Kirsty, please tell me more…

So, I made a little five minute video to launch the class and er, I got a bit over-excited…

This is either charming and funny OR I’m a complete dork, I haven’t quite decided which yet. It makes me laugh but I suspect that may be because I’m a dork.

Buy the class

If I’ve convinced you, head on over to Tara’s site and buy the class.

Share the news

P.S. If you’d like to share this, please click one of the social media buttons below.

And I will love you forever and come round to your house with chocolates. OK, maybe not the chocolate part because some of you are very far away but I would be very grateful and happy because I want to get this out to as many people as possible.

Hey lovelies, it’s been killing me to keep this quiet, so I’m chuffed to bits that I can finally announce my Super-Exciting Something. Ta-da! Next week I’ll be teaching my...

During November I’m taking part in the Customer Love Challenge.

photo credit: qthomasbower

Huh? What is the Customer Love Challenge?

The Customer Love Challenge started in September of this year after Naomi Dunford from Ittybiz wrote this post about how if you needed to make a lot of money quickly, you should love on your people hard for 28 days and then ask them for money on the last 2 days.

LaVonne Ellis from The Complete Flake got all inspired, said, ‘let’s do it!’ and the first Customer Love Challenge was born.

Now LaVonne wants to run another one during November to make use of all the things learnt from the first one.

Can anyone join in?

Of course. At the moment there are at least two other artists taking part – Léan from String Revolution and Melissa Dinwiddie from Living A Creative Life – and I think it would be fabulous if more arty people joined in.

If you’re interested in taking part, you can sign up here and download a free e-book. There’s also a Yahoo group for participants and the Twitter hashtag is #customerlove (just stick that into the search box on Twitter & you’ll see all the stuff people are saying about the challenge).

Do I have to sell something at the end of the month?

Nope. Your goal could be something different like increasing your blog readership, discovering more about your customers, getting more sign-ups to your mailing list or making new connections.

I won’t be launching anything new at the end of November for two reasons.

Firstly, I’ve already got A Super-Exciting Something scheduled for the second week of November. The Super-Exciting Something will go on sale this week and you can expect an announcement within the next couple of days.

Plus I want to run a 48 hour sale on my birthday, which is on the 15th December. That feels like enough to me.

Why are you taking part?

Me, passing up a chance for some hawt internet lovin’? Are you crazy?

I’m doing Customer Love partly because the idea scared me and I like to face things down but also because I want to get to know my readers better and tell you all how much I appreciate you.

What are you going to do?

I have no freaking clue!

OK, that’s not quite true. I’ve written down a few ideas and things are starting to take shape. However, I’m very open to suggestions on this one, so if there’s any way that I can help you, please leave a comment below or drop me a line and I’ll give it my best shot.

During November I’m taking part in the Customer Love Challenge. photo credit: qthomasbower Huh? What is the Customer Love Challenge? The Customer Love Challenge started in September of this year...